


Heartbeat Song

by CivisCaeli



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-30 02:18:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6404674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CivisCaeli/pseuds/CivisCaeli
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-shot. Mid-6x22, includes Bonkai showdown, different ending (AU, I suppose). A little Matt/Bonnie, a little Bonnie/Kai. (Originally posted on Fanfiction.net 5/15/15)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heartbeat Song

"…since I _should_ have bled you out, one painful ounce at a time. I mean, that's what you deserved." Bonnie swallowed, defiantly rolling her eyes. They found the floor soon after as the sinister voice continued. " _You_ left me behind in 1903, which I did not appreciate. But I guess you forgot about that old, Canadian rock filled with Bennett blood. Anyway, even though I got out, now I kinda just want to make you suffer in new and, if I may say so myself, totally inspiring ways."

By now, her eyes had found Matt, watching him from her seat beside him. She tried to measure his response to what he was hearing and was following the lines of his face for a hint before his lips parted. "What is this?" his voice questioned.

"…Keep watching," she whispered.

* * *

Matt held Bonnie close, hugging her tightly. He couldn't stop his own heart from hammering in his ears, or his eyes from tearing up, but he'd be there for her and she'd been there for all them in the past, for as long as she needed. And he was determined to be strong while doing so, even if it _was_ just a front.

"I don't understand. All I've heard and all you guys have told me about this guy… I thought he couldn't do magic?"

"He couldn't. Not on his own at least. But he has Lily's family now. The ones we left behind in the 1903 prison world?" Matt pulled away, nodding and measuring her eyes. They'd started misting up as badly as his own and her lip was trembling. A small glance alerted him shoulders that were following suit so his hand found Bonnie's before sliding up her arm and bringing her closer, her head moving to rest beneath his chin this time, letting her continue.

"This morning, I dreamt that they'd escaped. That they'd found a work-around in the plan to abandon Kai in that world. But we had a wedding to finish preparing for and so much good to look forward to." Bonnie shook her head against him, voice muffling. "I thought I was just being paranoid. And now it's my fault."

"Aw, Bon, no it's not. You couldn't have known anyone but Lily was there. You _didn't_ know."

"But I was fairly sure starving vampire/witch hybrids aren't the types who'd mind making a deal with the devil. I could have warned them. I could have done more."

Matt smiled sadly, wiping a tear from her cheek. "You _always_ do more, Bon. More than anyone else, usually. And we'll get through this as we always do. Because if there's one thing I've learned, it's that there's always a loophole." Rising from his seat and swallowing down his own tears, Matt reached for Bonnie, giving her a small, reassuring smile before catching her hand in his, "Ready for war?"

Sniffling, Bonnie's free hand wiped away stray tears with a nod before she followed Matt down the hall and out the front door.

Bonnie's thoughts trailed through her mind on the way on the way to the wedding venue, back to when she'd last found herself in his warm embrace, being enveloped all around by Matt's arms and consoling words. Having shortly before been tied up in the danger of being suffocated by invisible hands, they'd shared a moment together with the single, isolating realization that they were different. They were… mortal. The fact used to be easy to forget with the company they keep, but having gone through her near ending in the 1994 prison world, she was no stranger to the concept.

But he'd whispered that to himself in agony on the way to the hospital, angrier than she'd ever seen him. Upset at himself for being unable to protect himself long enough to help her. Angry over his friendship with the very types of people who kept putting them in danger. It was unbearable, made all the more so by the fact that she could feel it, too. Her fingers reached out in response and when her fingertips touched his, they curled around hers and he had quieted instantly.

At the present, and still feeling the effects of finding out that a now hybrid Kai had tied her life to Elena's, she liked that the thought of that hospital ride reminded her of the past; of a happier time and a mortal life she knew she'd never have again. She held it to the forefront of her consciousness until forced to let it drift away, forced down by the sight of something she'd become more accustomed to than she'd cared to admit over the past few years: chaos and destruction. Exiting the car and moving closer, she saw fire through the windows, giving the inside a hellish glow that bobbed, reflected on the multiple shards of shattered glass below.

Knowing that Tyler would probably need him more than she would right now, Bonnie sent Matt away to find him. And now alone, she entered the building slowly to find Kai weaving through the debris of broken chairs and tables amongst a layer of motionless bodies. Watching him, in the dim light of the room, she could see the wounds at his neck, blood having soaked through the white collar of his shirt.

"Hello!" Kai called, looking around at the bodies strewn around the room. "Anyone still alive? Anyone alive, just raise your hand."

As his feet crunched into glass, Bonnie dared to inch closer to get a better look in light of the call Matt had received about Tyler becoming werewolf again. Whether impaled or bitten, she figured she'd find out soon enough, but with the heaviness of his steps, she was hoping she'd lucked out on the latter having happened.

"I need blood…" he muttered, fueling her steps. Hopefully he'd be weak enough not to put up much of a fight then.

"You need more than blood," she quipped with a grin, wanting to mock him as he had in her dreams. She pointed to her own neck in reference to his wound. "Maybe some ointment. …'cuz _gross."_

Kai turned, eyeing her before letting his own grin escape and releasing a forced cackle of his own. His fingers reached to pull his collar away from his neck, exposing what Bonnie could now see to be a bite mark, still fresh and oozing. "Your friends think you're funny? Because maybe if you were funny… if you were the one with the good jokes who they could always count on to make them laugh, maybe they'd be cool with letting _you_ live instead of Elena."

"You're right," Bonnie responded, shrugging. "Sadistic humor is _your_ thing. I'm just the one that does magic." With a knowing smile, Bonnie could feel her power surge, from the center of her nervous stomach, equipped with all the confusion, loneliness, heartache and delirium she'd felt for the months he'd left her alone to suffer in prison. It twitched at her fingers, feeling like live, fragmented wire just looking for water to connect with, to bolster its intensity upon the fact that _finally_ she could finish what she started and never, ever see his smug, humiliating face again. "Undo the spell, Kai!"

"I can't. What's done is done."

In her fury, Bonnie teetered on the mental image of the blood in his head boiling until his brain melted and dripped from his nose. She could almost feel it happening, even at a distance. But she needed him... she couldn't do that until he undid the spell. So she settled for the middle ground and broke his legs instead just to hear him scream.

But then he laughed, curling on the ground, and the very sound made her teeth grind together.

"I can't undo the spell, Bonnie," gasped Kai, utterly gleeful. "My death made it permanent."

"Then I'll just wait for the werewolf bite to kill you," she responded, easing away slowly from him as he moved to sit up. She had no intention of letting that happen. Of letting this chance slip through her fingers. Matt's words appeared in her mind again, as she looked for the nearest piece of wood.

_…there's always a loophole._

"You know what's funny? I didn't even know werewolves were real… until I got bit by one." Kai mused, gasping softly as she searched, finding the nearby chair leg and breaking it off. Bonnie ignored him, lining herself up behind him for a shot at his back and feeling the power she'd felt move through her the last time she'd performed the very same action in 1903. She inched toward him, stopping at the last of his words.

"The thing is, Bon. The only way a guy turns into a wolf is if it's magic, right? So technically, their venom's magic, too. So I just went ahead and siphoned it up."

Kai rose, turning to face Bonnie, who shivered, finding her brain severing connection with her limbs long enough for her to drop her makeshift stake before coming back online to scream at her that once again, her luck had just run out. "No… no…" was all she could whisper as she rose into the air and flew into the wall behind.

The last thing she could recall was the feeling of her ribs breaking and puncturing her lungs as she dropped to the floor.

* * *

When her eyes opened, the first thing she saw was him, the glow of the room flickering against the darkness of his eyes. "Bonnie," he whispered delicately, his speech strained and constricted. "You alright?"

She wanted to scream at him. To yell and smash her fists into his face until he was as bloody as her insides surely were. But it was hard to breathe and he healed too quickly for it to matter anyway. She croaked instead, trying to save what little breath she could and devoting what energy she had left to hoping help would come soon.

Kai sat down next to her, hand resting on the back of hers as he knew she was too weak to push it away. "Finally. You're still and quiet enough to listen to me. No running away from me now and no stabbing me in the back this time, hm?" Her eyes narrowed at him as she wished she had the power to will herself away from his gaze. She whimpered and shuddered at the sight of his hand, then, moving to rest on her upper stomach.

"Shh. Quiet down now, Bon. I've a story to tell you and possibly not much time to do it in." He closed his eyes, muttering softly and pressing against her ribs just long enough for her breathing to become a bit easier. "You caught me off guard. You and that guy… you caught me shortly after transition. Lily gave me her blood in exchange for the location of that lovely set of "heretics" you gifted me with the chance to know."

Kai chuckled, shaking his head. "Quite the bunch, that. And here I am, as "heretical" as they are. But first things first. You interrupted me and I did the only thing I thought to do without hurting you as much as I could have. I choked you both and… well…" In the dim light, Bonnie could tell he was blushing. She could even feel the heat grow from his fingers. "I fed from you. Not him, but you. You were my first and you were enough. And I fought the desire to kill you in those moments despite the burning in my veins telling me to do so."

Bonnie could see his face contort into a grimace and wondered what on earth was going on. But he'd only healed her enough to listen, and from the sound of his words, had paused the worsening of her condition only enough not to die. So although she didn't believe a word he was saying, she had no choice but to rest against the sound of his voice. Fatigued and sullen, her eyes closed. Being fed on was the _last_ thing she wanted to hear about.

"These powers… they're so unlike anything else I've ever felt. You never actually know until you _know…_ until you _experience_ it first hand and… Bon, everything's intensified. The world, _everything_ just changes. Immediately. You notice things that were always there and it boggles your mind to think that you'd ever missed them when human. How could we miss things that are so beautiful?"

Kai's hand reached for her chin, thumb stroking her cheek. The feeling caused her eyes to open and stare at him, focused on the sight of the burning fire in them. He surprised her, moving to sit a bit closer. "Remember when I told you I just wanted to feel your hand on my chest? Well, Ms. Bennett, did you know just how beautiful the heartbeat in _your_ chest is? How it sounds when you're that close to me? The music that the very essence of your being emits? How mesmerizing and comforting that connection was with you, the moment I felt it?" With a frown, Kai bit his lip, his words sounding ghostly in the hollow, lifeless room.

"I was just so hungry. But when I fell into the rhythm of your heartbeat and it connected with mine, and they shared their beats in sync, I couldn't bring myself to kill you. The hunger faded. The desire to murder you faded. And at first, I hated myself for it. Hated you for leaving me in prison and torturing me all over again. But look at what it gave me, Bonnie. I finally have what my family said I'd never be capable of and what I've always felt absent from my life. And I have a _never-ending_ supply. How could I hate you for giving me _that_?"

"You were the first person I'd seen face to face in almost 20 years. I'd just made it to Mystic Falls after finding out that the Bennett whose blood I'd need to escape lived there. Your grandmother, that is. I didn't expect to find anyone, of course, but there you were. Outside on the lawn with your nose in a grimoire." A grin escaped on Kai's lips again, and Bonnie felt as if she were floating, his words bringing taking her back to a memory she'd thought she'd long forgotten. It was as if she were there all over again, the sun on her face, the grass against her skin. The peace and hope she'd felt back then - the knowledge that her Grams would never send her to a prison she'd be unable to escape from - comforted her even now.

"I couldn't stop staring. And when I learned more about you and Damon, you were the only one I could even consider standing of the two of you. To be honest, you reminded me of the things I loved so much about Jo – your patience, your devotion to your friends, your eternal optimism. The way you didn't deserve Damon's ridicule or the things he said about you."

Kai paused, listening with his new hearing, she could tell, to see if anyone had arrived yet. Satisfied with his results, he turned, to again find her eyes and whisper to her, "I liked being a psychopath before you, Bonnie Bennett. But I've found that I like this so much better. So, I'll give you a choice."

It took a moment for him to move and Bonnie feared his absence, not only conflicted with her feelings about the situation, but confused as to where all of this had come from. She knew he fancied her. Or at least, liked flirting with her, as she'd experienced in 1994. But this? What the heck was _this_? And did he really expect her to trust him after all he'd done to make her life a living hell?

Lost in her thoughts, she jumped at the feeling of his cold fingers on her temples, crying out sharply in pain. Panicked, she saw Kai's face a moment later, his hands in front of her eyes in a motion of surrender. "Calm, Bonnie. I'm sorry, I should have warned you. I'm going to dull the pain a bit more and then show you something I'd like you to see. Is that okay?" He waited until she sighed, begrudgingly nodding once.

She heard him provide an invisibility cloak for them and felt him graze her ribs again. Shortly after, he moved behind her head and once more touched her temples until she saw the very room they were in, with the two of them, her and Kai, standing apart from each other as they were before.

* * *

_"Option 1," Simulation Kai started. "You can kill me. However you wish. I'll even go out with a bang and put my all into it, making it the Fight of the Century if you want. I understand that I hurt you, deeply and irrevocably. And after merging with Luke, he didn't hesitate to make me feel every bit of remorse possible for all the bad that I've done. It's why I had to see you when you came back."_

_He took a step forward as tears filled his eyes. The sight was so unusual, Bonnie didn't know what to do with herself… or him, for that matter. She took a step back in time with his own toward her, unsure. Noticing, he kept his distance, lowering his gaze. "Honestly… I just wanted to apologize back then. And now, too. I really, sincerely am sorry. And if I could take it back, knowing what I do now, I would. So if you'll allow me to apologize, if it's your desire to seek your revenge against me like I did with my family, by all means, do so. Go ahead… break my legs again."_

_Bonnie did so, frowning and listening to Kai scream as he had before. Testing him, she amped up the cruelty, grinding the bones in his legs to dust and walking over to him, watching the slow, excruciating pain of his bones growing back begin. She lifted him, flew him into the wall as he'd done to her, broke every bit of his back and every rib in his chest. Boiled his blood, made it acid and then some. She did everything she could think of to hurt him and he took every bit of pain until the sound of his screams bounced against the room's walls, hitting the streaks of blood there. She kneeled then, next to him, and used her mind to control the vision, healing him completely._

_She measured him, considering his enticing offer. But hesitant to trust him, she made him continue._

_"And Option 2?"_

_"Option 2, you let me apologize to your face, allow me to leave with my life and I leave you alone. You'll never, ever see me again. I promise. And just in case, if for any reason that promise is broken, be it accidentally or on purpose, my life is yours to do with what you choose."_

_Taken aback by the prospect of Option 2, Bonnie shivered, her heart battling with her mind over which would be best. With the effect that her time alone in 1994 had caused, she leaned toward Option 1 wanting to ignore the moral compass she knew was telling her to do otherwise. She looked up from her consideration at the sound of Kai's soft voice._

_"There is an Option 3 as well, however. It's the reason why I set this all up and incapacitated you long enough for me to explain. I lied, Bonnie. I lied about to whom Elena's life is tied."_

_"What? You can't be serious. Kai, how am I meant to believe you AFTER admitting you've lied to me AGAIN? Hell, how do I even know that you're not planning on frying my brain now and making Elena into a vegetable so that no one wins? Why would you expect me to trust you?"_

_"Because it's the last time I'll ever do it to you. That's another promise I'll tie my own life to. I'm sorry, Bonnie, but I had to try."_

_Tired of his words, Bonnie shoved him against the wall again, holding him there until she broke the four legs off another chair and threw them, the aim impaling him in the stomach. He screamed, gasping. "Try what, Kai… huh? What twisted game do you have up your sleeve NOW?"_

_"I wanted to see who'd Damon choose!" Kai cried out, dropping from the wall and curling into fetal position. Bonnie moved closer, watching his blood gather at the tips of wood pressed straight through him, until it dripped and pooled together. She let out a low growl in response._

_"What's it matter to you? It's no business of yours. And if you really knew me, you'd know by now that it I'd gladly give my life for my friends. As you_ have _no friends and no longer any family, I understand if that concept's completely lost on you."_

_Kai was coughing up blood now, still curled over and unable to find the comfortable position on his back that he'd found in their first fight of the night. He waited until the coughing slowed. "It matters, Bonnie, because I care about you. More than I have words to describe it."_

_Shaking and upset, Bonnie moved her hand, mercilessly motioning for him to move to his back and stretching his limbs apart until his joints threatened dislocation. Calmly, she walked closer to him, face mere inches away from his. "I know I said you're the one with the talent for sadistic humor, but that's an awfully sick joke, Kai. Do I sound amused to you?"_

_It was all Kai could do to speak, and even then, it was nothing but a hoarse whisper. "No."_

_"You're right Kai. I'm not. Know why?" Bonnie's wrist moved again, her hand motioning for the chair legs to push further into him on their own until he groaned and painfully answered._

_"Why?"_

_Bonnie's lips nearly touched his ear as she whispered. "Because IT'S. NOT. FUNNY."_

_Kai's tears were running down his face and instead of talking, all he could do was sob softly, aching in pain. Bonnie turned over a chair from one of the tables and sat, watching him._

_"There are no words for the pain that I felt, Kai. The isolation. The abuse. The raw violation of being stabbed in the stomach by someone you thought you could trust, even if only a little bit. It doesn't feel very good, does it, Kai? You thought I was kinder than this, didn't you?"_

_Kai's whimper was the only answer she expected, and the only one she wanted to hear._

_"I wanted to kill myself, Kai. I thought I was so strong. You know, compared to the time spent bickering with Damon, I thought it'd be tolerable to have you around." Bonnie moved from the chair, echoing his actions and sitting next to him on the floor with a sad smirk. "At least you were a flirt and easy on the eyes. After the departure of Ms. Cuddles, I'd resigned myself to an eternity in prison with you. And you know what? … I was okay with that. Overjoyed even, when you said we could part and go our separate ways."_

_Bonnie's fingers trailed along his face, feeling the sweat there. Her fingers moved to wipe the wet hair gently away from his forehead before whispering, "After all… it's a big world out there. We could spend forever traveling every inch of it and could have never seen each other again." Choosing to use her own hands this time, Bonnie stopped pulling at Kai's limbs and begin slowly pulling out the chair legs, one by one, from this stomach. Still whispering, she continued._

_"But you just had to go and ruin everything. You left me there until things were so bad that I tried to kill myself. But hey, now I know how you felt, though right?"_

_Groaning, Kai begin healing enough to give a soft, groggy response. "I know… I was there… with you."_

_Bonnie's hand stopped in mid-air at the sound of his words. Frowning again, she prompted him to continue. "What?"_

_"Was there… with you… on your birthday. Your death pact. Damon. Elena. Jeremy. We were there. Trying to stop… with atlas."_

_Bonnie continued, pulling the remaining legs from Kai's stomach, letting him heal until his breathing settled enough to speak. "What do you mean you were there? How?"_

_"We went back as a group. Like the movie,_ Ghost _with Patrick Swayze?" Kai shook his head, regaining his composure. "I know… I miss that guy, too."_

_Riled up, Bonnie's fist landed somewhere in the general vicinity of where she was aiming. "You were saying?" she asked, irritable._

_"They wanted to reach out to you and send you a message so you'd know about Nova Scotia. I took them all, we found out you were drinking the death pact bourbon and because I could only take one long term, I took Jeremy. He found the atlas. Made me stay put and went to find you. My irrational, lunatic of a sister tried to kill me mid-travel but we got the message to you. We had to and I had to help. I understood that despair. Thoroughly. And I was drowning in remorse. It was your birthday, I had to do something to help."_

_"I told Elena and Damon about my time there, though." Bonnie said, moving away from him quickly. Standing, she readied her hand again, ready for another round of pain. "And this isn't proof. You could have tortured that out of Damon in exchange for wanting to talk to me at the rav-"_

_"But I didn't!" Kai interrupted, cowering. "Please! I can… I can prove it to you. I can tell you exactly what you were doing and what you said. I was standing right there… behind you. I could never forget that day. I'm telling the truth!"_

_Stilling, Bonnie sighed slowly, fighting the desire to breathe fire in her anger and end this nonsense. "I'm listening."_

_"You said, "cheers to making it this far," drank the bourbon you and Damon chose for your death pact. And then said, "okay… think it's time I cut myself off." Then you threw the bottle of bourbon to the ground. Even before your birthday, I couldn't stop thinking about you. And what I saw… I'll never forget it Bonnie, honestly. I wanted to die right along with you that day."_

_"STOP IT! STOP it. What.. are you doing?" Backing away, Bonnie shook her head as Kai rose to feet and stood, swallowing. His eyes were red, she found, as she stopped and stared at him, her own eyes stinging as she pushed back tears. "Why are you doing this to me? I didn't tell_ anyone _about that so where are you getting it from? I'd be able to feel if you were searching my thoughts."_

 _"You know, Bonnie." Kai responded, achingly quiet in the large room. She could barely hear him, but didn't need to. She_ did _know._

_"Bonnie… Option 3 is the chance to see who Damon will choose. In 1994, he told me that he liked you. But… Bonnie, I heard the things he said about you when you weren't around, which weren't much different from the negative things he said to your face._

_Maybe it's true. Maybe that IS just how you two show your love. But I've heard you two talk about your time in Mystic Falls so I know how you got there, giving your life for your friends. Damon should be grateful. But is he? Did he even say thank you? Elena's not dead, won't age and this is only temporary, so if he IS grateful, is he grateful enough to choose you over Elena? Or will you have to die again? Since arriving, I've learned the Other Side's gone, so, of course, there's no coming back this time."_

_Bonnie felt it again. That pain, throbbing through every inch of her body. That shoulder-rattling, aching sob wanting to escape and toss her to and fro, tearing her asunder until she was a torrent of misery. The first tear broke free, and found its way to the floor._

_Bonnie remembered death. The feeling of the ancestors' disapproval... so thick and stifling that she could feel it in all of her actions, every movement of her body. The limbo found on the other side had been an isolating and lonely purgatory, made worse by a consuming feeling of eternal permanence. And without it, she didn't want to discover what was left. Not after all she'd gone through to recapture the little life she had left, post-traumatic as it may be._

_All the years of being the go-to girl. The supernatural errand runner of the group. The pain she felt finding out about Jeremy and Anna. The pain she felt when she made it back to Mystic Falls and he never bothered to return her phone call. The loneliness that overwhelmed her all over again when she found out about the revolving door of women after her death and his having left for art school before her return. The day she heard Elena's voice in 1994… the moment she ran to the Gilbert house, expecting to see their faces and feel their embraces and go home. The months that passed after without contact. The silence. The silence…_ _**that silence** _ _…_

_It was suddenly crushed by Kai's voice._

_He didn't dare move toward her again, but the tone and volume of his voice spoke more words than he did. She sat back down, grasping the sides of the chair in an effort to stop her shoulders from quivering. She was appreciative then, for the lack of silence and allowed him to speak at length in thanks._

_"Bonnie, I swear, before you sent me back to 1903, I only wanted to apologize to you. I'd have left you alone after. I only wanted to say I'm sorry and have you actually hear me. After the merge, I tried to get to you. I asked Jo. I was even going to contact the rest of my family if I couldn't find anything. I couldn't rest knowing you'd possibly be there forever._

_And after you left 1903, I was consumed in anger. So I returned, taped the video and found Lily. But when I saw you and felt your heartbeat… when everything faded, and this stupid sleeping beauty idea popped into my head, I was angrier at myself than you. I couldn't fathom what was wrong with me, so I tried to hurt you tonight... badly, to see if I was the same Kai that I used to be. But I_ __only ended up hurting myself more; each nasty word was a double-edged sword, and_ I nearly had a panic attack when you hit the wall and I realized that I could, in that instant, lose you permanently. _

_And I admit it, okay? I'm a messed up, broken individual, Bonnie. I sought and carried out revenge on a family for whom my love was not enough. They told me I was an abomination; an irredeemable piece of trash, long before I pursued my siblings like I did. I was the criticized and the outcast. And now I'm just a new person on a cracked, barely there foundation. But there's_ nothing _disputable about how I feel about you; you're the last person I'd dare care about and from you all I seek is forgiveness._

_But even if you never give me another chance to prove that, I don't want you to have to waste your life again for someone who claims to be your friend but treats you otherwise. I heard you that night when you told him that his remorse made him different than I was. But I feel remorse now and I've felt the pain of losing you. I value your life above all others. I have no one else. But if he chooses Elena over you, how is that any different than what you think I'd do to you?"_

_Bonnie stared at him, soaking everything in as tears continuously dripped from her chin. Keeping her mouth closed kept down the sobbing but even then, it was a tough feat to succeed at. She tried to keep her next statements short._

_"If he chooses Elena, then what?"_

_"Then I let him walk away and do what you want me to. Want me to leave you alone? Okay. Want me to tell him the truth? Okay. Want me to unlink Elena? Okay. I will do that and more for you."_

_"And if he chooses me?"_

_"Then he'll heal you. And either you tell him not to kill me or you let him. Or you can do it yourself. Either way doesn't matter to me. But at least you'll know."_

_Bonnie considered her options and by the time she was done, she was merely sniffling. Rising and moving a step closer, she decided. "Option 3. Deal."_

_Holding her gaze, Kai swallowed and nodded. "Deal."_

* * *

It took a text message for Damon to come and an anti-invisibility spell for him to finally see them this time. Kai had heard him the first time, but had effectively shielded everything that'd make them discernible to the senses, enhanced or no. He'd had business to take care of that was more important than an irritated Salvatore and Kai refused to be rushed.

Dazed, Damon arrived in the same room he'd checked his first time around, searching for any sign of Bonnie. Her name left his lips the moment he heard her gasping. Kai bit his lip, wincing at the sound. He'd neither un-paused the deterioration of Bonnie's wounds nor un-numbed the pain he'd done away with but even with all of that, he knew she was still in a lot of pain. With his extensive repertoire of deaths, he knew a ruptured anything still hurt like hell, even if you knew you weren't going to die from it.

Damon rushed over, kneeling down to examine Bonnie. And it was the care and concern of his touch that made a strange feeling trickle through Kai. It made him upset and felt a lot like indigestion; Kai didn't know whether he wanted a TUMS or to rip Damon's head off. These alien feelings had been less fun than he anticipated; and he'd already assumed they'd be as fun as a non-Gemini funeral.

Well, now at least he wouldn't have to _try_ to make this convincing.

Seething, his voice broke into the air. "How dumb are _you?_ " He asked. "I deliver you a dying Bonnie Bennett on a silver platter and _whoosh_ , it went right over your head." Moving from his seat, he could hear Bonnie calling for Damon, and it only made the sensation worse, multiplied by the sound of her suffering continuing on longer than it needed. He couldn't describe the feeling accurately with words so he used the cruel ones he'd reserved for his family. "Translation: She's about to _croak._ Of course… you don't _have_ to help her. You could just walk away. She dies of a collapsed lung, no blood on your hands and you and Elena get to live the life you've always dreamed of."

Kai had seen that look before. It was the same one Bonnie had given him not long ago – one of the ever so deep thought that precipitates the making of a difficult decision. He pressed him further. "Either way, you better act quick."

Struggling to breathe, Bonnie waited until Damon made his decision, sealing it with a kiss to the forehead. "I'm so sorry, Bonnie."

Kai could see the surprise on her face. All while feeling the surprise on his own. He hadn't expected that. Thought it could happen, sure, but now that it had? The sheer, inconceivable reality of such a choice pressed upon him with such strength that he was left silent, struggling beneath the weight of it. And once again, it hit at him with the coolness and force of an avalanche - the realization that for him, the decision would always be easy and that there'd only ever be one choice. The thought made him light-headed and knocked the wind out of his lungs; made his stomach tingle and buzz with what he didn't know were butterflies.

He watched Damon take his time pulling away, patting Bonnie's hand until she wrenched her fingers away from his and curled over into a dejected fetal position. Her pain made evident long before she met Kai's eyes, he could feel his butterflies become angry, buzzing bees, following after Damon's sauntering form. The sound of his completed departure cemented the event, ungluing Kai's feet. He rushed to Bonnie's side, tenderly sitting her up and grazing softly over her ribs. "Bonnie… it's okay… I'm here. I'm here."

Bonnie's eyes were glazed over, her breathing having become quiet, but he could feel the rattling in her chest all the same. He tried not to touch her. Tried to respect her desire for distance. Respect her right to distrust him, even now. So he pulled away from her a bit, making sure she could still sit up despite the space between them.

"Do you want me to heal you now?"

Bonnie's eyes burned from the smoke and the pain of her tears. She felt as if what was the last of her breath said "I do," followed by the weight of suffocation lifting with Kai's hands as easily as it'd arrived. His hands checked the rest of her for damage, healing as he went. The last was a bruise on her wrist. She breathed the first full gulp of air she'd had in a long time and he waited patiently, gazing at her.

It struck Bonnie, then, how careful he'd been. How much forethought he had; enough to know she'd likely not be ready for anything near comfortable touching with the likes of him. But something _was_ different, and she, too, could see it now. And it softened her, just a bit, towards him.

"Is there anything else?" he inquired.

Bonnie mulled it over. Damon's choice had hurt her, but sadly, she knew there was a chance he'd make it. She'd not have chosen Option 3 had she thought otherwise. He had to decide between two mortals and he went with the one he wanted forever with; because two nearly dead mortals aren't so different from two soon-to-be dead ones, she'd found. But both were very different from the ones from whom life is not easily taken; for whom the life of others is so easily discarded. Bonnie had never experienced life as the last group, but her experience with those who had made her conclude that the lacking purpose of immortality made people selfish with likes of life and death.

Bonnie had only known to give mercy. So that's the path she chose.

"I want you to give me space and time." She responded, reaching for his hand hesitantly. "And… I forgive you, Kai. So long as the truth and kept promises continue between us."

Kai nodded, and Bonnie felt a bubble of happiness she didn't expect at the sight of him trying to fight back a genuine smile. He bit his lip and offered, "What about Damon and Elena?"

"Leave them connected. I love my friends, but I'm tired of being collateral damage and I refuse to rescue them this time. Not yet, at least. They're going to have to learn how to fend for themselves for a little while. Or 60 years or so."

She had to laugh at the sudden look of surprise from Kai. "Not like Damon's getting any older, right?"

That genuine smile finally escaped, displayed brilliantly across Kai's face. "Well, you're the boss."

Bonnie bit back a smile for a moment, but gave into it in time. Her wrist was still in his hand, giving her access to his wrist as well. She pressed her fingers there, feeling his pulse. Strong and lively, it quickened as she met his eyes and it felt oddly similar to the moment she'd found the ascendant hidden next to his chest. She pulled back slightly, moving to curl her fingers around his.

"Mm, and don't you forget it either."

Kai's other hand raised, ever so slowly and he allowed her eyes to follow it, keeping his hand open in her line of sight before asking, through his motions, if he could touch her again. She nodded once and watched his eyes follow the contours of her face. Kai's thumb pressed softly against her forehead, gliding over the area Damon had kissed. Erasing it permanently. "Never. I promise not to."

With a small lean forward, Bonnie let him press his own kiss in to her forehead, replacing the one of her traitor with the one sealing his promises.

And this time, Bonnie believed him.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N. Rated M because it's a bit violent. Had do to something about that finale. Hope you enjoyed. :)  
> Disclaimer: I don't own the canon characters. Everything pre-owned belongs to its owner(s). No copyright infringement intended.


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